Saturday, September 6, 2014

Haven



This realm is warped; it’s twisted somehow, thrown out of dimensions, independent from time. It exists somewhere beyond the borders of this known nature, this everyday surrounding; resting diabolically in its accelerating behavior, truly wicked by origin… indescribable, possibly incomprehensible. It stands beyond any disease of the mind, beyond any mental illness known so far. Somehow it’s shaped into some form of occupation, a way of existence, an obsession which can be possessed so savage and selfish, a possession (nonetheless) though wild in its character, accepted with such a brute despite its freedom of being. It’s all I have, my identification: this restlessness of mine, all mine!

And against all this, something else circles from above, a certain contrast for sure… It can’t be deciphered in dreams, since it stands across them, sometimes within them. It’s a chase, troubling me, tormenting me, destroying with some sort of gentle touch the entire fabric of this vicious me. If I wouldn’t accept it as a calling, I’d understand it as a plot against me, threatening to annihilate me, to transform me into invisibility of existence. And all this calm, this home so desired, a calling which seduces full of nothing but love for which I yearned so deeply… am I truly the one who deserves it? Am I to forgive myself and accept it, relinquishing myself of all those troublesome burdens which came to pass and existed within symbiotically? And forgiveness… could I do that to myself…? since my guilt… that despicable bitch of a guilt is out of proportion, my guilt is beyond any repair! It’s mine, all fuckin’ mine!

Are you that beautiful, graceful and noble to adopt me as yours? Are you the one offering me a new rebirth, a haven from the diabolical me? Somewhere, somehow… in ways;)

2 comments:

  1. You might have to wait for a while... Or you'll find the graceful one just around the corner!
    Good luck!

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